OK…OK…let’s try this again. After a kidney stone made High Dive scramble earlier in the summer to replace YHC as Q, then fartsacking my own Q for the first time in my history with F3 after July 4th (parties all day, late fireworks and booze the night before made the fartsack inescapable I guess). High Dive had a lovely present for me afterwards…a fantastically woven burlap sack with SHAME on the front. Wore it, did some burpees, became the poster boy. Let’s go.

The Thang:

Blare old Christian rock/metal/punk/ska (playlist in channel) – maybe your cup of tea, maybe not…deal with it and rock out with Demon Hunter kicking us off

Mosey, SSH, Toe Picker, Sun gods, Phelps to warm up with burpees sprinkled in, high knees and butt kickers were in there somewhere – rain picking up

Butkis’ with incline merkin drops (or burpees as Z calls them, he never lets me have anything, I like complicated naming man)

Webbicides – Suicides to first parking space, drop, 1 merkin, run back then go up 2 spaces, 2 merkins R&R up to 10 – SSH for the 6 – Everyone is in great spirits…so much so that Z wishes he fartsacked, because he hates positivity and easy workouts.

Group Mosey/Sprint/Backwards Run/Sprint on Q’s command – Careless Whisperer begins to play the sax in the distance, claiming he had to tie a shoe, but really swooning over YHC’s amazing Q while Dr. Tron does interpretive dancing

ATMs (2 rounds) – 15 Alt Shoulder taps (4 count), Tempo Merkins (copperhead) x10, 15 single count Merkins – Z smartly stays standing while YHC explains the routine. High Dive takes the 2nd round cadence, putting a slight welsh accent into it foreshadowing the fun to come…

Repeat Mosey/Sprint/Backwards run/Sprint – no one has merloted yet, but some dude keeps running past us…I think it was CW’s sax play that drew him near

Welsh Dragons – Plank position, 4 bear crawls up, 1 merkin, 1 plank jack, 4 bear crawls, 2 merkins, 2 plank jacks (Escalator up to 10) – fairly bad on the arms, thankfully no complaints, but someone passed out, though we think that was from bad diet choices and crop dusting from the PAX in front of him.

Sprints backwards and forwards – Silverado and Brad Pitt are monsters…

M/S/BR/Sprint – stopping to do burpees, arms liked that choice…brains did not

Descending Curb Crawls – 11 derkins, bear crawl to curb across from you, 10 derkins, crawl back – repeat until 0 – low plank for the 6, not that is so stupid…

Squat Jumps for the 6 – do 20 as a group when 6 is done (altogether separately OYO)

Mosey to “flag” which is buried in High Dive’s truck. Didn’t have time to unload it because he was preparing and playing with his sack for me…hmmm….that sounds weird…

Captain Thors up to 10 (1 bbs, 4 Amer Hammers, 2:8, etc…) Someone begins to hum, making spittle very loudly…I think they were having a heart attack after seeing my amazing glutes flash up during the hammers…you’re welcome, bring singles next time

Sprints to finish time (suck it Brainfart)

I put on the sack of shame and embrace the itching insanity that comes with it. Z regales us with his time as a TETRIS grandmaster of the arcades…just as thrilling as it sounds.